Commenting On Divorce

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard that a friend or relative of mine was getting a divorce and I’ve said, “You were too good for him (or her) anyway.” Not always, but often enough that it makes me shudder now. I was trying to be encouraging, but in hindsight, I should have just given my friend or relative a hug.

I didn’t realize that getting a divorce is like amputating a limb. It may be gangrenous, or otherwise bad for you, but divorce results in losing a part of you. Who wouldn’t miss a leg or an arm? The two really do become one, and it is a loss that is incomprehensible to those who have never felt it. Our society is so good at throwing things away, but throwing away a part of yourself is about the most painful thing commonly experienced.

So from now on, when I hear about somebody getting divorced, I’m going to say, “I love you. I’m praying for you.” And then I’m going to give them a big hug. Because those three things are what helped me keep my sanity when I lost my husband. As much as I “deserve better,” I lost a part of me. I lost my best friend of many years. The father of my daughters is like a stranger, and that is a pain that doesn’t just flit away. So, for those of you out there going through a divorce, or even a tough marriage, I’m on your side. So is God, even if you can’t feel Him. He hates divorce, and I can see why. It just plain hurts people. God has better plans–to prosper us, to give us a future and to give us hope. See Jeremiah 29:11. It’ll help.


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