Daily Prompt: Stubborn

via Daily Prompt: Stubborn

Love your enemies? See how Leah McPhillen reacts to tragedy and romance.

I wish God would stop trying to teach me certain lessons. I’m stubborn, and I’m not going to learn.

Everywhere I go, I seem to draw challenging people toward me. When I drive, there’s speed demon behind me and Grandpa Gristle putt-putting in front of me. I rarely miss a red light when I’m late for something. When I go to work, I seem to end up in trouble no matter what. I’m a person who gets great satisfaction in a job done well, but for some reason, (I think God is stubbornly trying to teach me patience) I end up with the short end of the stick.

I didn’t know my husband was an addict when I married him, and there’s a gift that keeps on giving. That man can make me lose my mind, my religion, my temper…you get the idea. The better I am to him, the more he stabs me in the back. So I HAVE to be on guard every minute in case I’m too nice. The knives will come quickly. I tried to divorce him once, but I just couldn’t do it. Jesus kept reminding me about the unforgiving servant. I’ve never grabbed him and thrown him in prison, but I have wished we were back in Puritan times once or twice so he could suffer just a little for his selfish ways.

I’ve started to work out and take better care of myself since I turned 50, so do you think I could just do my 30 minute circuit at Planet Fitness in peace? Oh no. Some guys have to jump in front of me and have a lifting contest or something every time I go. It’s like God wants me to turn off my emotions completely. But I’m stubbornly passionate, and just can’t do it.

So I guess my life will never be boring. Yes, I do like to commit to a lot of things because I’m interested in a lot of things. Yes, I live in the most free, richest country on earth and enjoy great blessings because of it–so my life is comparatively easy. But I would be SO happy if I could just have one week in which everything is boring as watching paint dry. That isn’t a stubborn request, is it?


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